Preventing Child Abuse

PREVENTING CHILD ABUSE

As concerned adults, we want to protect children from sexual abuse, but we can't always be there to do that. We can, however, teach children about sexual abuse in order to increase their awareness and coping skills. Without frightening children, we can provide them with appropriate safety information and support at every stage of their development.

We can provide personal safety information to children in a matter-of-fact way, with other routine safety discussions about fire, water, health, etc. Although even the best educated child cannot always avoid sexual abuse, children who are well prepared will be more likely to tell you if abuse has occurred. This is a child's best defense. In order to protect children, teach them:

   To feel good about themselves and know they are loved, valued and deserve to be safe

   The difference between safe and unsafe touches

   The proper names for all body parts, so they will be able to communicate clearly

   That safety rules apply to all adults, not just strangers

   That their bodies belong to them and nobody has the right to touch them or hurt them

   That they can say "no" to requests that make them feel uncomfortable--even from a close relative or family friend

    To report to you if any adult asks them to keep a secret

    That some adults have problems

   That they can rely on you to believe and protect them if they tell you about abuse

   That they are not bad or to blame for sexual abuse

   To tell a trusted adult about abuse even if they are afraid of what may happen

   To tell your child that they have a right to say "no" and to tell.

Other things a Parent can do to prevent Child Abuse

   Give your child enough of your time so that the child will not seek attention from other adults.

   Know with whom your child is spending time. Be careful about letting your child spend time in out-of-the-way places with other adults or older children. Plan to visit your child's caregiver without notice.

   Tell someone in authority if you suspect that your child or some else's child is being abused.

Prevention measures to safeguard your children should begin early, since a number of child abuse cases involve preschoolers. The following guidelines offer age-appropriate topics to discuss with your children:

   18 months - Teach your child the proper names for body parts.

   3-5 years - Teach your child about private parts of the body and how to say no to sexual advances. Give straightforward answers about sex. Empower them about their bodies.

   5-8 years - Discuss safety away from home and the difference between good touch, bad touch, & confusing touches. Encourage your child to talk about scary experiences.

   8-12 years - Stress personal safety. Start to discuss rules of sexual conduct that are accepted by the family.

   13-18 years - Stress personal safety. Discuss rape, date rape, sexually transmitted diseases, and unintended pregnancy.

Your child's teacher, school counselor, or pediatrician can help you teach your child to avoid sexual abuse. The know how this can be done without making your child unduly upset or fearful. For further information on child sexual abuse and other forms of abuse, write to the National Committee for prevention of Child Abuse, P.O. Box 2866, Chicago, IL 60690.

Your pediatrician understands the importance of communication between parents and children. Your doctor is trained to detect the signs of child sexual abuse. Ask your pediatrician for advice on ways to protect your children.

This digest was adapted from the flyer Child Sexual Abuse: What it Is and How to Prevent It, copyright 1988 American Academy of Pediatrics.

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